Tips for Writing Wedding Vows
Thinking about writing your own wedding vows? As intimidating and overwhelming it may be, in our opinion we think it is well worth the extra special effort for a special intimate moment during the ceremony expressing your love, promises and commitments for one another in front of your loved ones.
So where to start? We have asked our Southwest experts for there top tips to writing the perfect wedding vows.
Rachael’s Top Tips for Wring Wedding Vows
- Write from your heart not from google. Write for your partners ears not your guests.
- Write how you would speak, be true to YOUR style. If your not funny, don’t try to be. If your not romeo keep it short and sweet. Be your self that is why they love you!
- This is your one chance to tell your partner why you love them, why you chose them, what you will do to keep them. So be detailed, pour your heart out and trust me you won’t regret it.
Nikki’s Top Tip’s for Writing Wedding Vows
- Make sure you have time to really think about what you want to say. Don’t rush them and don’t over think them!
- Keep the length of your vows similar to your partners. If one writes a page and the other writes a paragraph, you both may end up feeling a bit silly, and no one wants that on their wedding day! Either time yourself, or write and adjust when comparing the length.
- Be completely yourself when making your vows or promises to your partner. Don’t go all formal and serious, if you are light hearted and fun daily. Be authentically you! If you stir one another up, do that in your vows, but follow it up with something heartfelt and genuine. Discuss the tone you’re going for with your partner and ensure theirs match up. Keep them honest and completely you!
- Include things such as: What you love most about your partner? What you are most proud of that you’ve achieved together? What you can’t wait for in this amazing future you’ve both imagined? Make fun, light hearted promises to one another like: promising to always rinse out the milk frother or coffee mug as you know they never do, if this is the kind of humour that is fun to you both, if not, speak from the heart and romantic if this is how you are in your daily life. I’m a big believer of a mix of from the heart, romantic and fun. If you’re laughing you’re enjoying yourself.
- Don’t show one another or read them to one another! Keep them a surprise so you feel and witness genuine and raw, beautiful emotion on your big day.
- Email them to your celebrant to edit and ask their opinion.
- You will also need to say legal vows on your wedding day. Ask your celebrant if they pop them on the beginning or end or could you somehow weave them into your personal vows if you’d prefer.
Emma’s Top Tip’s for Writing Wedding Vows
The first thing to remember is that there are no rules. The only thing that matters is that what you say comes from the heart.
Writing vows can feel overwhelming, you might feel that you have nothing to say, you may feel that your words are not enough to sum up your feelings or you might think that what you do have to say will sound silly. But just remember anything that you have to say is important.
I think a good place to start is some things that you love about your partner, for example
- What do you remember about them when you first met?
- What are some of your favourite things about them?
- In what ways do they make your life better?
- How do they make you feel?
- How have you changed because of them?
- What impact do they have on other people?
Then move onto some things goals or plans for your future, for example
- What does this marriage mean to you?
- How do you see your future together?
- What goals and values do you share? How will you achieve these?
Then you can finish with some actual promises
- How will you be a good marriage partner?
- What things will you do for your partner?
- What sort of person will you be for your partner?
Then, finish with one powerful line to sum up everything you have said, and you have your vows!
I recommend that rather than sit down and just write your vows, brainstorm first, jot down words and feelings that represent your partner. Don’t be afraid to ask for help – either your celebrant, a trusted friend or family member. Express your vows however you feel most comfortable, if you are the poetic type – write a poem; if rap music is your thing – write a rap song! And one final piece of advice, don’t leave it until the night before your wedding to start!
- Get some ideas on paper- think about special moments you have shared, what you love about each other, when did you know they were the one, what promises you want to make, etc.
- Research other wedding vows and find inspiration. See what you and your partner like. Do you want to make it emotional, funny, poetic? See what feels right for you.
- Practice makes perfect. Keep practicing and going over your vows and editing them to be perfect. On the day its not a priority nor a requirement to memorise your vows, but we would suggest just practicing them enough so that they stick in your head.
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